


i hate you

by 8REKI8ARR



Series: general homestuck oneshots [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Asshole Vriska Serket, Caliginous Romance | Kismesis, F/F, Minor Kanaya Maryam/Vriska Serket, Minor Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam, Pesterlog(s) (Homestuck), Seer Rose Lalonde, They talk, Trans Female Rose Lalonde, Typing Quirks (Homestuck), and are in a kismesistude, fight me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-18 14:48:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29859717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/8REKI8ARR/pseuds/8REKI8ARR
Summary: Rose and Vriska have alovelylittle chat||=||ik this is probably really ooc but i wanted to write them
Relationships: Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam, Rose Lalonde/Vriska Serket
Series: general homestuck oneshots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2195295
Kudos: 3





	i hate you

\--arachnidsGrip [AG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT]\--

AG: Heeeeeeeey Rose!  
AG: How are you doing on this _8loody_ fine day?  
TT: Hello Vriska.  
TT: Why are you messaging me? We are literally a couple rooms apart, you could very easily walk to me and initiate a conversation that way.  
AG: 8ecause I'm so very 8ored! 8ored enough that I can't 8e 8othered to walk to you and talk to you in the flesh. Is that so hard to understand?  
AG: Well of course it is! Well.. to YOU anyway.  
TT: Or, you are merely being lazy.  
AG: I'll tell you something here Lalonde. I am M8NY things! 8est troll here 8y a long shot, gam8ligant queen, FLARP master and too many other things. 8ut I am NOT at all lazy! I'm just not feeling active enough today is all.  
TT: So lazy?  
AG: No!!!!!!!!  
TT: If you don't mind me asking, what was the purpose of messaging me? Did you expect to get something out of me, by chance?  
TT: Because I'd hate to disappoint, but it seems to not have worked.  
AG: Woopdy F8CKING doo Lalonde. You know how to suppress your emotions! Are you proud of yourself yet?  
AG: 'Cuz you sure seem so.  
TT: Rather.  
AG: Lalonde. Do you know a8out our romance system 8y.. any small chance?  
AG: Odd question. I know, 8ut I do reeeeeeeeally want to know! ::::)  
TT: The basics, yes. Why?  
AG: The 8asics you say?  
AG: You _say_ 8asics 8ut what do you know? In detail.  
TT: Well, I know that what you refer to as a "Matespritship" is very similar to what we humans refer to as love. The basic knowledge of human love, anyway. I have also heard a thing or two about.. Auspistice?  
TT: I believe it is spelt that way.  
AG: Yep.  
TT: I have heard quite a bit about this "Quadrant" from Kanaya. She explained quite little about it explicitly but from what I have gathered it is the vacillation of two trolls in a deep hate-love relationship. Or in shorter terms, a troll who stops two other trolls from killing each other from pure rage.  
AG: Yeah okay Miss Wordy I wanted a small explain8tion not an entiiiiiiiire lecture a8out the romance I grew up learning a8out. You still need to learn a 8unch more 8TW. :::;D  
TT: Well. I would apologise to you Vriska, but I seem to not want to at the moment.  
AG: Thin fucking ice Lalonde.  
AG: This ice is very very thin.  
AG: Actually, I think it might 8r8k soon if you're not careful.  
TT: That would be a shame wouldn't it?  
TT: If I were to so much as step the boundary, the metaphorical ice I have been placed on would shatter. How bad I would feel for you if that were to happen seeing how you seem to favour that ice so much.  
AG: Oh shut up.  
AG: You act like you're all high and mighty Lalonde 8ut guess what? YOU 8'NT.  
AG: I mean Jegus Christ. you act like you're the a8solute 8est person here following fucking Strider the almighty fucking slam po8ry master! NOT. And yes, for your inform8ion, I do know that you're slaging me off 8ehind my 8ack. I'm not that dum8.  
TT: I am doing no such thing. I am merely giving..  
TT: Could it be called constructive criticism on my friends past relationships?  
AG: No. Not really? I mean may8e? I don't know!  
TT: It should.  
TT: But onto another topic. How about I "promote" you? Seeing how you believe I am to be seen as an almighty being, how do you feel about being my "second in command"?  
AG: How would I feel? Weeeeeeeell I am already the one in command here, if you've already forgot!  
AG: So I guess it would 8e gr8 to 8e in cahoots with you Lalonde.  
AG: Even though I am far a8ove you!  
TT: Then has it been agreed?  
AG: Yeah?  
AG: Can't w8 to see you soon partner! ::::D <3<  
TT: Wait what?

\--arachnidsGrip [AG] has ceased trolling tentacleTherapist [TT]\--

TT: Why do I feel like I have now made a terrible mistake?


End file.
